CULTIVATE CREATIVE COMMUNITY IN CHICAGO
Believe it or not, moving into a big city with no connections at twenty was not the bravest thing I'd done in my lifetime. (Did you know I moved overseas solo after High School? A topic for another day, I suppose!) In the city I found it incredibly hard to meet people who wanted friends or even had the same kind of humor. I had no connections to universities in Chicago (how many of my friends kept a community after moving) so I worked with a few non profits to meet like-minded people. Then I realized building any foundational community was going to take a lot more leg work. It called for self-awareness and that meant being honest with what kind of community I needed. Often, in our time of loneliness we don't realize the people we truly need in life. It was a huge coming-of-age moment for me to see some people just weren't going to fit in my life and that was okay.
"But how do you find it?!" The answer eluded me.
It’s easy to feel alone in the creative community. While we all search for outlets to express ourselves, if you didn’t go to school for the specific field you’re in, it can be difficult to discover others that inhabit the same circle as you do. I felt really down about not knowing anyone in such a large and beautiful city. In my mind, everyone did it better than me. Every one was more fashionable, more creative, more schooled. How would people find value in me if everyone else was seemingly vastly more successful in life than myself?!
When I was eighteen and living overseas, newspapers were writing about my documentation of the stories from people I met while living in South Africa. The pictures I quickly snapped because I was captivated by their tale of hope in so much brokenness was producing a lot of hope Stateside, too. Yet for some reason, when I moved to Chicago my camera collected dust and my blog grew quiet. I had let fear of not being good enough keep me from showing up - but if I believe everyone else is one of a kind, why can't I be, too?!
It takes one person to be brave and stand behind what they believe but with a community rising up - that’s where real inspiration and change is produced.
In January I took the step of faith to open this page and create a community - I didn't know how often I could post or if anyone would read - but I challenged myself to show up. I was tired of seeing the average blonde lifestyle blogger sharing a posed feed with products I couldn't afford and telling me about experiences that looked amazing but were just over-glamorized due to the promotional deal they copped. Once again it created an environment of comparison. I found myself thinking, "Can someone just be real on here? And that is what I am so excited to share with you today.
It's been about 9 months of showing up for Safe Haven in the City. I've changed jobs for this. I've rearranged schedules to accommodate the oddly-timed photoshoots and events. I am so thankful that my day job is something I love and allows me to pay the bills in order to pursue my dream of writing. It's become clear to me that without the right creative community behind you, it is so easy to find yourself backed in a corner carrying a weight never meant for solely you.
Instagram and Facebook have taken their platform from a life-sharing community to a paid advertisement. It often seems like they keep small pages and businesses who have something to say from growing because they want people to utilize paid ads. Y’all were with me last week when I shared my disappointment with the reach and outcome of my most recent promotion. The promised goal was not reached and it made me question why I was investing in a promotional system that only gives facetime to those who pay $$$. That moment would have felt entirely defeating if it weren't the other bloggers and creative community I'm a part of that echoed my sentiment. I wasn't the only one!
It wasn't until this summer with Safe Haven did I begin to really start truly exchanging life with some amazing women over Instagram. So many of the ladies I've become friends with were endeared to me because of their brave ability to live life online without filter. As much as we complain about Instagram algorithms and add-ons not working in our favor, I can't help but be so thankful for Instagram bringing these fabulous women in my life!
As someone who enjoys photography, style, advocating for others, and highlighting real life instead of a highlight reel, it became difficult to find creative and passionate people. Instagram can feel like an isolating desert but it truly is an opportunity to meet those who are passionate in ways similar and different than you, who are unique and embracing their own identity, and confidently encouraging you to do the same.
It took a lot of time and effort to find people with the same value system as myself. I've learned if you are captivated by something unique , it consists of continually showing up and putting forth effort. Sometimes showing up means you're alone. It takes an immense amount of practice, consistency, and a supportive community to stand behind you: especially when you doubt yourself.
I'm here today to introduce you to my favorite ladies in Chicago embracing their voices and cultivating Instagram to be a more honest space! (No one knows I'm doing this by the way so I'm pretty excited to surprise them.) PSA: everyone's website is linked on their name and their Instagram handle is linked in the snap of their feed! Go give these amazing women some love!!
I am completely captivated by Andi's upbeat and encouraging honesty. She hooks me every time with her perkiness and willingness to try whatever! Also, she's recently embarked on paying back debt and is BASICALLY LIVESTREAMING THE ENTIRE PROCESS. This kind of real life is just not seen on social media! She's posting Monday Money-Saving Hacks and inviting you in the very process most people wouldn't want anyone else seeing. Plus, she's just a gem to hang out with.
I started following Christine about a month into my Insta-blogging journey and was so excited to see a beautiful lady highlighting the needs of our city! She is passionate in advocating for animal health and safety in our city. I've learned a lot from her sharing what's going in Chicago and what to vote for when it comes for advocating for animal rights. Plus, she shares some adorable pictures of adoptable pets so why would I not follow?!
I bumped into a location tag and saw Kaitlin lived around the neighborhood I worked in. We chatted on IG for a while and finally met up for dinner the other day. It was such a blast and we barely talked about our blogs - just life. She's such a real one and her captions always lift my spirits because she's so frickin real, y'all. Anyway, she keeps me sane from all the self-absorbed b.s. many people spew on IG. I'm really thankful to call a real one like her my friend. (Also, she knows all these fancy pop up stores that come into Chicago - I follow her for those fun fashion secrets!)
I met Mindy through another blogger friend of mine, Alex from @sassyconfetti. We were at J Crew for the launch of their new Universal Standard (size inclusion). "You have to meet Mindy, you'll love her. She works with a non profit - you two have so much in common!" The minute I talked to Mindy it felt like I had this friend who not only understood me, but was so excited to share life. She's a style icon and she so passionate about uplifting others and pursuing equality.
I actually met Vickee organically! We ran in the same circles of creatives and I found her recently on Instagram, too. She is so brilliantly creative in a facet of ways. She walks with style, class, and passion. I love watching her IGTV episodes where she is raw with conviction, consistently speaking truth, and encouraging her fellow women. If you need inspiration in any kind of way, Vickee is your girl!!
Amanda and I met at the first blogger event I ventured out to. We both hadn't come with a plus one and chatted for a moment in between activities. When I posted about a new coffee shop I had really fallen for, Amanda asked if we could meet up for coffee there. We had the best time talking about our adjustment to living online, our status with romantic relationships, and our upcoming goals. Amanda listened and encouraged me to go on when I paused - questioning if I was sharing too much - and I'm so grateful for that!
I'm also really pumped for her as she is sharing best places to meet people and network with. I briefly mentioned how important it is to know what you want and she's breaking it down calling it, "Cocktails and Connections." If only I had read this when I was a newb in the city!
I hope you know this is a safe space to encourage each other in our real lives and to be authentic. All of these ladies are cheering for you, too! Hey, while you're here - I just added a new newsletter opt in so that these weekly blogs will land in your inbox and you can find them easier. Feel free to email me at safehaveninthe city @ gmail.com!
CHEERS from C H I C A G O,
ashley brianna
