Single And Still Special

Self love is a beautiful thing. And being a single lady in a large city I feel like I have to remind myself of my value often! I grew up in a community that stressed the importance of marrying the right person and made singleness appear as a time to wait patiently. Everyone has a different perspective of what that means but I’m here to tell you, LIVE YOUR LIFE YOU SINGLE WONDERFUL BEING.

That’s easier said than done, though. The social media highlight reel hits you and everyone is engaged, in a relationship, planning a wedding…we get it. And I’m genuinely happy for them! But if I’m not investing time in believing the value I hold as a single person, I get a little down. I’m hopeful this little piece sparks some conversation so we can lift each other up in value and community going forward!

I am worth.. fresh flowers.

My favorite thing way to start the weekend is stop by the farmers market, pick up fresh flowers, and arrange them with a fresh cup of coffee in hand. I'm always moved by such a small gesture but it's a great reminder that I don't need someone to buy them for me and I deserve some pretty things! I’m also highly motivated by food (surprise!) and a donut or two from Stan’s Donuts is my favorite morning treat. (Personally, blueberry old fashioned and cinnamon cake donut. OH MY WORD.)

My time is valuable.

Don’t negate the powerful reminder that you’re valuable to take a day or two off. Nothing is more refreshing to me than a break from the normal and remember you are more than your 9-5. Groupon is the best for finding inexpensive deals like massages, nail spots, or evening entertainment. My favorite place is Lincoln Park Massage Spa, they are so sweet and always have an open slot for when I need a little boost. Good Beauty in Logan Square has amazing nail technicians and services, too! I love going to hotel spas for facials because you normally have access to their pool and hotel restaurants, too! If you have a favorite, send them my way because I'm still looking for a favorite!

I like who I am..and I embrace it.

This whole page is really coming out of something I've been meditating on since last October. I was seeing someone for the companionship but wasn't being valued or challenged to grow. What really woke me up was seeing how my friends valued me versus how I valued myself. In honor of National Women's Day, World Relief sent Proverbs 31 cards to give and empower the other women in your life. I placed one on my mirror with the words, "She is far more valuable than rubies." Lisa Terkurst's book Uninvited encouraged me I wasn't alone and my perception of my worth needed to grow in order for me to have true healthy relationships. A crucial truth I've come to embrace is speaking and feeding the words that build yourself up. My style-blogger friend Mattie shared, "I find at least two positive things about myself when I get ready in the morning. And I try to surround myself with friends who encourage me to be my true self." In a world where we constantly judge off of outward appearances, I love seeing someone so beautiful take the time to reflect what truly makes her beautiful. Nicole, my coworker-now-friend, yoga extraordinaire, confided, "I keep a collection of bath things in a special box. Whenever I need a boost I create a "bath cocktail." She mixes music records, bath bombs, face masks, epsom salts, and bath oils to create the ultimate spa experience! I love how she uses her creativity to transform her bath into a spa!

As I reflected what I do to embrace who I am I asked my amazing friends who added depth to the thoughts I had! I love buying bath items and using a little each weekend (or when I wake up early feeling crappy on a weekday.) Target just added this que bella line of face masks that are amazing and this lotion/bath gel combo has been my favorite for over a year now. But the purchase I'm most excited about are these boots from Nordstrom. They're not the most practical but I feel like I'm walking in a Beyonce music video every time I wear them and that's worth something, right?

Okay, so the things that really restore my soul? Bubble Baths and Jazz. Books with depth. Coffee and conversations with friends. The biggest step I've taken this year was launching this passion project and inviting others to join. When I validated what I was passionate about and invested in myself, that's when I believed my self worth. So if you're cringing or scrambling as Valentine's Day approaches, just know this can be the best holiday single. Invite some friends or spend it alone, light some candles, and tuck in for a good book. Don't let anyone tell you who you are or what you love is not significant.

Y O U A R E V A L U A B L E.

Cheers From C H I C A G O,